{"id":59777,"date":"2021-11-16T07:26:16","date_gmt":"2021-11-16T12:26:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/?p=59777"},"modified":"2021-11-16T07:26:19","modified_gmt":"2021-11-16T12:26:19","slug":"how-to-help-kids-build-resiliency","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/how-to-help-kids-build-resiliency\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Help Kids Build Resiliency"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I would <\/em>argue that a little protection in the early years is a good thing. No need to throw a young child to the wolves. Giving children a little time to develop confidence in who they are while they learn these skills can do wonders for them down the road.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I believe the best things we can do for our kids is to help them feel loved, encourage their confidence, and build their resiliency.\u00a0 Although our desire to protect our children comes from a place of love, it\u2019s vital that as they grow they discover how to protect themselves and bounce back when life throws a challenge in their path.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What is resiliency?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Resiliency is a skill that\u2019s learned, not one that we\u2019re born with.\u00a0 It\u2019s defined as our ability to recover and bounce back after we\u2019ve encountered a challenge, obstacle, setback, trauma or disappointment.\u00a0 According the the American Psychological Association<\/a>, helping our kids build their resiliency when they\u2019re young sets them up for success for the rest of their life. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Resilient children can regroup and try again instead of becoming depressed and feeling hopeless after making a mistake.\u00a0 This allows them to succeed where a non-resilient kid would have just given up.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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8 ways to help kids build resiliency<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s clear that resiliency is essential; but, how do we help our kids build resiliency?\u00a0 It’s something I’ve looked into and luckily, it doesn\u2019t seem take a lot of work.\u00a0 A few simple tweaks to our everyday interactions with them can set our kids on the path to becoming resilient in the face of challenges. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Don\u2019t fix all of their problems<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

To become resilient, kids need to encounter challenges.\u00a0 It can be so hard not to rush in and help, but sometimes it\u2019s better if we hang back.\u00a0 Solving their problems will cause them to become overly reliant on us and lose confidence in their own ability to solve problems.\u00a0 When our child comes to us with a frustration or problem, we can be supportive and listen but not jump in with an instant solution. Being empathetic and inquiring what ways they can problem solve this can help them work out possible solutions themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Help them identify their emotions<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Becoming resilient involves recognizing negative emotions such as frustration, fear, anger and disappointment.\u00a0When the girls were young, helping them name their feelings helped so much in getting rid of tantrums<\/a>. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

We can help our children identify these emotions by asking how a particular challenge or difficulty made them feel.\u00a0 Burying feelings is not a part of resiliency.\u00a0 We need to acknowledge how we felt so that you can move on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Recognizing positive emotions is also helpful.\u00a0 After our child overcomes their challenge and bounces back, we can help them see how that success made them feel happy, proud or relieved. This will encourage the habit of pushing through challenges.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Teach them to embrace mistakes<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

You can\u2019t bounce back from mistakes if you\u2019re not making any.\u00a0 Let our kids see that we\u2019re not perfect and show them it\u2019s okay to make mistakes.\u00a0 The key here is to focus on what we can learn from the mistakes, not the fact that we made them.\u00a0 Ask your child what they\u2019d do differently next time, and they\u2019ll begin to focus on the solution and not the fact that they made a mistake.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Show them coping skills<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Some challenges and difficulties can be more complex than others.\u00a0 Once our children have identified a negative emotions they feel due to a hardship, it\u2019s important they know how to deal with those emotions.\u00a0 Try teaching them coping skills such as journaling, meditation, yoga, deep breathing, or getting outside for fresh air and movement.\u00a0 <\/p>\n\n\n\n

These skills will go a long way towards taking the pain out of the difficulty they\u2019re facing.\u00a0 This also sets them up to choose healthy coping mechanisms instead of unhealthy ones when they\u2019re an adult.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Focus on the positives<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

This strategy goes hand in hand with embracing mistakes.\u00a0 Instead of dwelling on the negatives of their situation, show them the silver lining.\u00a0 This could be their opportunity to try again and learn how to approach the problem differently.\u00a0 Or it might be the unexpected bonus that comes from a difficult situation.\u00a0 For example, a child might be sad that they weren\u2019t invited to attend a friend\u2019s birthday party, but we can show them that this means there\u2019s time for the two of us to go out to the theatre to watch that movie they\u2019ve been so excited about.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Encourage them to take risks<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s healthy for your kids to take risks.\u00a0 It helps them learn what works and what doesn\u2019t work.\u00a0 Instead of telling them no, they can\u2019t do something, ask them what their plan is.\u00a0 This will allow them to think through their ideas.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Risk-taking and trying new things will teach them to be brave and embrace life\u2019s challenges.\u00a0 A kid who decides to take a risk and try out for a sports team when they\u2019re younger will be more likely to apply for an exciting job when they get older. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Teach them how to solve problems<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Resiliency doesn\u2019t mean doing everything yourself.\u00a0 In fact, it\u2019s important that our kids know they can come to us for help.\u00a0 They should know that while we\u2019re not going to solve their problems, we will always listen to them to help them come up with a solution on their own.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Be a good role model<\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Like all things, the best thing we can do to help our kids build their resiliency is model resiliency.\u00a0 We need to show our kids what it looks like when we face a challenge or difficulty.\u00a0 We don\u2019t have to go into specifics, but we can let them know in a general way that we\u2019ve encountered a problem and that although it makes us feel certain emotions, we’re going to work through it.\u00a0 Show them the coping strategies you\u2019re going to use to bounce back from your setback and let them see you bravely trying again.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This will help our children see the resiliency pathway from start to finish, and they\u2019ll better know what to do when they face a problem.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Helping our kids build their resiliency isn’t complicated.\u00a0 The main thing to remember as a parent is that our children need to face difficulty so they can learn to overcome it.\u00a0 And that can be really freaking hard when our instincts are to protect them. However, supporting them in their challenges and helping them push through to the next step will go a long way in developing lifelong resiliency skills.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Life is full of challenges, especially today in our ever-connected and pseudo-anonymous online world. As much as we might want to protect…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":59779,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"inline_featured_image":false,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[2142,2262,1618],"tags":[],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/59777"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=59777"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/59777\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":59782,"href":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/59777\/revisions\/59782"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/59779"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=59777"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=59777"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.ahealthysliceoflife.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=59777"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}