Yesterday was a dumpster fire.

That’s such an exaggeration, but it was fun to type. Yesterday was stressful though. Do you ever have those days where you just decide you can’t possibly take on a single other thing? A solid night’s sleep (where I am now) always makes me feel like I’m being dramatic, but yesterday me wanted to shout “MY PLATE IS FULL.”

When our cleaner for our short term rental property left us high and dry, it was the straw that broke this camel’s back.

I was teaching the kids, dealing with a stuffy-nosed Kaitlyn, making dinner, organizing some calendar and scheduling, doing the hidden work load stuff that all us moms do, and then all of a sudden I was messaging and calling and interviewing cleaners. I was not in my element.

I hired our previous cleaner and if I had my doubts on my hiring abilities before, let’s just say her letting us down out of the blue like that solidified that opinion of my hiring abilities. I blame myself because I am too trusting and look for the good in everyone and ignore signs I shouldn’t.

The enneagram 7 me and morning perspective me now feels like this is all probably for the best. We believe we have a great (better!) candidate lined up, but when I was faced with calling and interviewing people I was almost in tears. I text something to David along the lines of “I don’t want to do this anymore.” Referring to…. everything.

It’s so funny how much yesterday shows off how… not fake, but how not all encompassing, the online world is. How so? Well, these are the random photos I had snapped during the day:

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Wholesome and cozy right? And it was. But I also was losing my freaking mind for about 7 hours during this, too. Even though it’s not intentional, we don’t really snap pictures of our stressful moments though, do we? Just something to remind ourselves us as we head into the holiday season filled with family, friends, love, decorations, and joy? Is it all real? Yes it is. But is everyone aching quietly somehow or struggling with something in the background? Most likely.

Back to gift guides tomorrow; just had to come on here and let it out this morning 🙂

More presence and patience? Actually, yes. Somehow while calling and interviewing and almost crying, I kicked butt as a mom, too. I don’t say this lightly. I broke up a wicked fight between the girls only to find the sweetest, non-instructed apology notes they wrote and snuck to each other afterwards. Those moments make you feel like maybe you’re doing something right after all.

More time outside? Yes, the weather is beautiful! A lot of driveway time yesterday.

Less phone? Less scrolling? Yes. But I was glued to it for messaging purposes.

Read a novel? Does Harry Potter count? I think it counts.

Less alcohol? No beverages. I’m at 7 days with a beverage out of 17 days total. But CBD definitely helped me out yesterday.

Meditate? I did. Kaitlyn woke up while I was and came and snuggled on top of me. It was super sweet. Maybe not as effective, but I didn’t mind.

Track groceries? I didn’t spend anything and have started the new month of tracking. Last month reflections coming sometime in the next week.