Tomorrow begins a new month, August. This means that in 6 short weeks, I’ll be celebrating the anniversary of the most exhilarating day of my life, also known as Hailey’s 1st birthday. This occasion fills me with joy, pride and a bit of anxiety.
…Wait, what? Why anxiety?
I’ll tell you why anxiety… BLOGS. PINTEREST. ETSY.
As wonderful as these new online tools are for getting ideas and planning events, they inevitably lead to a feeling of inadequacy when your event doesn’t have every detail color coordinating with the overall theme. At least, that’s how I feel.
(picture source)
I’m so grateful that Pinterest wasn’t around while I was wedding planning. Would I have felt the need for more elaborate tablescapes? Would I have actually known the word tablescape?
Now that I’m in mom world, I’ve seen 1st birthday parties transform into the new version of MTV’s Sweet 16. Seriously, I’m surprised there hasn’t been a spinoff focusing on the celebration of 12 months of life.
(picture source)
Don’t get me wrong, I’m in awe of mom’s that transform their child’s birthday into a themed wonderland. I admire the details of personalized water bottles, giant banners, dressed up characters and professionally baked, fondant covered cakes. However, it left me feeling like a subpar mom when I didn’t have the desire to rent a petting zoo for Hailey’s 1st birthday. (truth be told, I had the desire, but not the cash)
It took me a little while of internal struggle to figure out what to do in this situation. Do I want Hailey’s first birthday to be special and cute? Absolutely, but not at the cost of my sanity or the loss of our savings. And as with almost everything in babyland, I think you have to do what works best for you.
So, I’m doing things my way. Here’s the plan:
- Keep it small. Similar to wedding planning, your guest list can multiply at an ungodly rate if you let it. Instead of inviting all the people I can list, I’ll be inviting family and a few close friends. I want to be able to focus on the birthday girl, not stressing about being a proper host.
- Have a theme, but don’t buy the whole theme packet available on Etsy. I love a good theme as much as the next person and plan to have one for Hailey’s party. However, I think a few key items, like invitations and an outfit can define the theme, then I can take colors and run with it. Honestly, do I really need themed toothpicks? I’m hoping not. By the way, theme sneak peak: (!!)
- Save on invitations. This was a tough one for me. I really wanted a cute, themed invitation, but didn’t want to shell out big bucks printing and mailing them. Plus, I know other people will look at them, smile, then toss them in the trash. Not very environmentally-friendly. Instead, I paid $7 on Etsy for a digital invitation to be designed for me (fitting my theme). I’ll print out one to keep in Hailey’s baby book, one to frame at the party and then guests will have the digital image emailed to them as the official invite. This way, they’ll see the cute themed invitation, I’ll save a few bucks… and the Lorax will love me.
- Bake your own cake or cupcakes. Professionally done cakes are pretty awesome. In fact, there is an adorable bakery nearby that might as well be the Cake Boss because their cakes are incredibly detailed and downright impressive! However, I just can’t justify spending $50 (or more) on a perishable item that is going to be smashed between Hailey’s chubby little fingers. Instead, I’ll be baking cupcakes.
- Nix the goody bags. Does this make me heartless? I hope not. I’ve seen goody bags that others have had at their parties and they are so stinkin’ cute and, of course, go with the theme. However, rarely do I do much with them once we’re home. I plan on saving goody bags for when Hailey is older and it’s more of a children-based party.
I’m feeling pretty confident we can throw Hailey a memorable and special 1st birthday party without breaking the bank. And, much like a wedding, it’s important to remember the reason for the celebration. There may not be lion cubs present(darn it!), but people that love Hailey will be there to watch her smash her face into the cake, play with wrapping paper and enter into her next year of life.
Do you have any party planning, money saving tips?
Jenny says
Definitely bake your own cake/cupcakes. That’s what I did and it saved us a lot of $ if you shop at Party City or your local Dollar Store can probably find everything you need in her color theme for a relatively low cost as well. And enjoy it. Party planning can be stressful regardless of the theme or amount o ppl you invite. Do as much beforehand as possible! Can’t believe she’ll be 1 so soon!
Brittany says
Great idea on the Dollar Store- I’ll have to check that out! You did such a fabulous job on Garrett’s birthday!
Megan says
So glad you posted this. While I love them both, I think Pinterest and Etsy are often the cause for my anxieties in life! My daughter is only 6 months and I’m already thinking about her 1st birthday….yikes.
I plan on doing what I did for my wedding – splurge a little where guests actually can see it (food, drinks) and save where they don’t (invites, other accessories).
Brittany says
I totally agree. I actually followed the same rule for my wedding- we went all out on delicious food, open bar and a band, then used the standard linens and hurricane lamps that came with the venue to save $$
blackhuff says
You know what? These sites also make me feel like that. That if my event or party does not go the way that is illustrated on these sites, that I’m a failure.
Erica says
I absolutely love that you wrote this! I’ve already decided that I’m not going to let myself get caught up in wedding frenzy when the day comes to start planning. I’ll drive myself nuts and sink into the vortex that is Pintrest and Etsy.
Brittany says
It’s so easy to get caught up in it all! Looking back on my wedding, I’m glad we splurged on food, drinks and music and saved on centerpieces, favors, etc. People had a great time and that’s all that mattered to me 🙂
Caits says
What a good post! I’ve been thinking about my baby girl’s first birthday since she was born (or before, lets be honest) and have been stressing out. She’s one month younger than Hailey. Where did you get the digital invite??
Thanks for the info/ideas!! I love your blog. 🙂 — Caits
Brittany says
Hi Caits! I got Hailey’s digital invite from here: http://www.etsy.com/shop/LaPetitePartyShoppe?ref=seller_info She was so quick to respond and I just love all the designs she offers.
Can you believe our girls are almost a year old?? Crazy.
Stephanie says
OH MY GOSH, took the words right out of my mouth! I too have been having some anxiety about planning my daughter’s 1st bday party. We recently went to a 1 year old bday party and my friend went ALL out. It was beautiful, but I definitly don’t have the time, creativity, patience or money to do what she did! Thankfully my mom is very creative & a good baker! I’ve already signed her up to do a few things, but I don’t want to stress her out either! It’s supposed to be a fun day, but when Addy looks back on her 1st bday party all I really want her to see is how much love surrounded her!
Michelle says
I am so glad you posted this! I love Pinterest , but it does make me feel a little like an underachiever. We have also decided to bake our own cupcakes. My husband actually loves to bake so he will be baking and I will be decorating! This is as far as we have gotten in the birthday planning. We have decided on a theme and we are just going to try to build around it.
I honestly can’t believe the day is approaching so quickly, I remember last year at this time I was so anxious to meet her and now I have had the joy of getting to know her and see her grow for the past year! Its amazing 🙂 Good Luck with the Party Planning and Hailey is a doll!
Paulina says
I’m with you on this. I’m trying to live a simpler more sustainable life. Most of my baby stuff comes second hand, including her toys. We got a goody bag at a lovely 4 year old’s birthday party that had a My Little Pony, stickers, and plastic bracelets. Adorable, but also, unnecessary. I like the idea of asking everyone with a kid to bring a wrapped, used book from their own collection to be traded with everyone else at the party. That way, everyone gets a ‘gift’ and we aren’t adding to the amount of stuff we already have.
Looking forward to pictures from Hailey’s birthday! I can’t believe she’s almost a year old.
Brittany says
Paulina, that book idea is precious! I’ll have to use it for a future event, but wow, what a great idea!
KaraHadley says
I think cutting the goody bags is a great idea. Adults don’t want whistles or themed pencils. Another thing to consider is that a lot of grocery store bakeries will give you a free baby-sized cake if you buy a 1st birthday cake from them. Sure, it’s more expensive than baking your own, but in the long run it might be worth spending a few extra dollars to save yourself the hassle.
And I don’t know if the guests are going to be bringing Hailey presents, but if so, you might consider asking for a few savings bonds. Hailey isn’t going to remember that Aunt Sally or Cousin Thomas gave her a squeaking stuffed bear, but when she’s getting ready for college or her first apartment after college, she’ll sure be happy that they gave her a savings bond way back when. At least, that was my experience.
Dukebdc says
The way I approach budgeting for parties, etc., is to evaluate how much the guest of honor will remember and/or appreciate the effort. You can get away with cupcakes and a few balloons for a first birthday party. All she’ll ever know is the picture you have of her stuffing cake in her cute face, so you can pretty much skip everything else without guilt. 🙂
Marie-Sophie says
Go on http://www.younghouse.com ! They are always super-creative on a budget and they threw their daughter Clara a very cute bday party, I remember!!
Marie-Sophie says
oh man, Stupid iphone ! It’s http://www.younghouselove.com !!
Kimberly @ Healthy Strides says
You very much stole my rule book. Well, if I had a rule book. I almost went crazy on Etsy buying the cute hat and paper straws and the perfect ice cream cups. And then I realized Miles wouldn’t care. I went really simple with the food – just cake and ice cream. To make it more Pinterest-fied, I made a sundae bar and picked up mix-and-match glassware at Goodwill. In fact, I got glass sundae dishes at GW during a 50% off sale and it ended up being cheaper (and greener) than plastic bowls. It was really cute and no stress. http://healthystrides.blogspot.com/2012/07/food-friday-let-them-have-cake.html
Jodi says
Looking back, I loved everything about Avery’s firs birthday and I did it without any online site! 🙂 party city was awesome for all the basics, and I had a coupon that made me feel less guilty for some of the frivolous choices that were not necessary, but I wanted… I did cupcakes from a local bakery ( honestly not too pricey if you are keeping the party small) and mess cake from teeter. Keeping it small was key, Avery had a blast having friends and famliy there that she was familiar with. Happy early birthday to Hailey! Ps– definitely do the one year book from shutter fly if you have the time. Avery still asks for us to read it to her daily ( no joke, sometimes 5-6x per day…ugh..) but she loves to her her story and getting to see ‘the baby’…
Lisa says
Those sites can also make me feel a little inadequate. I mean all the recipes, crafts, makeup, house stuff, and hair I have pinned is never going to turn out how it looks in the photos….at all.;)
I really think you have a great way of approaching the birthday party!
Chrissy says
LOVE today’s blog post. Thanks! 🙂
I really like your idea for the digital invitation. I’ll have to check them out! I’m all about keeping it simple as well. What’s most important is that our little ones are surrounded by people who love them.
Ashley says
Yes! I’m also planning a 1st Bday party and struggling with cute/memorable vs. over the top/expensive. We tend to entertain a lot, so I searched Goodwill/Craigslist/Garage Sales for proper plates, napkins, silverware and tablecloths–all in white. No more disposable tableware and white always goes with any theme! It’s a lot easier to print or buy a few themed items to decorate the table than to always try to buy matching plates and napkins that just get trashed after 5 minutes of use!
Maria says
One of my roles for my job is to plan events and I absolutely love it and have a learned a thing or two along the way.
Decor: find things in nature that will work with your theme. They are free and you can recycle/reuse them! Suggestions: a bowl of lemons or apples, pinecones, freshly picked flowers from your garden. Also, look around at what you already own that you can repurpose. A clear glass pitcher works great as a vase. A wooden cutting board is a unique way to display a cheese and cracker platter. I just planned an education-based event and used hardback books I had sitting around for the table setting. Simply remove the cover and they look like art. You could do something similar with H’s children’s books.
Paper: if you have a nice printer, always DIY your paper for the event. Print out a menu and use a fun stamp (cheap at Michaels) to dress it up. Stamping is fun and when H gets older, you can get her involved in the action!
Also, remember that simplicity is always classy. I honestly think that having everything match is can get tacky real fast.
And you’re right, the focus should be on H!
Brittany says
You are full of awesome ideas- thanks!! Love the children book idea. Any tips for displaying cupcakes without buying a stand?
Maria says
Hmm. A variety of cake plates on pedestals always looks chic and Marshalls carries them for usually under $10 each (I’m sure you’ll use them again!). Or just use a pretty white platter and use the children’s books or a square vase (turned upside down) underneath the platter to prop it up like a cake stand!
Can’t wait to see how the party turns out!
Kelli H (Made in Sonoma) says
I have to say, a 1st birthday seems more for the family than the baby. H won’t remember her first birthday, but looking back on pictures, she’ll feel good that she was loved. I don’t think the tiny details are going to matter. Just getting together with friends & family, eating good food & drinks, and celebrating her life will be all that matters.
I’ve seriously felt the same way about some blogs. I’m like “how do you have all this time on your hands?!” It’s super cute, but wow….
Erin @ The Grass Skirt says
Great ideas! I’m sure that Hailey’s party will be a HUGE success. Even with my step-kids, I can tell you that it isn’t worth it to go crazy. The kids will have fun no matter what, and most of the crazy extras are only appreciated by the adults. Hailey certainly won’t care if the toothpicks at her party didn’t match the theme. 😉 Oh and the goodie bags usually get tossed anyway, as you said. Definitely no need to have them!
Lauren @ Chocolate, Cheese and Wine says
I completely agree – Pinterest is making me feel completely inadequate. I’m about to move into a new house and all of the amazing interior design pins have me completely overwhelmed.
Roz@weightingfor50 says
Love the idea of the simpler party. Haily is a lucky girl!!!
Susan @ Real Life Travels says
Im all about details but that’s just me, I think you can easily plan a great party without breaking the bank. I did a ton of stuff my self for CKs and made cupcakes. I also bought the cake from Harris Teeter for like 20 buck. His smash cake was 5! I’m also all about goody bags; the kids love them. (depending on the age). Even if it is a few little toys from the dollar store. But I dont think its a neccessity. It’s all about preference i really enjoy doing that kind of stuff its probably more for me then him at this point :). I’m sure H birthday will be a blast no matter what you decide! 🙂
Rebekah says
Hey Brittany,
Of course you don’t know me, but I follow your blog from time to time (love it!) and I have to say that I’m glad you wrote this. I am not an artsy-mommy and I don’t really want to be. I try to decorate the house/nursery-corner best I can, but my “thing” is writing, editing, and teaching (and playing with my baby girl). Come party times, that makes me feel kind of intimidated/guilty/terrible about not having a big bash (or even wanting to plan one). My little girl Amaré will be one Oct 8th (just a bit after Hailey!), and I plan to just do a family party with a home-made cake. Honestly, that’s about it! I hope she won’t hate me someday, but I suspect she’ll care more about her 4th, 5th, 6th etc birthday parties…. anyways. Making a huge, perfect, Pinterest one year old party is not something I’m planning on doing, and I actually purposefully am not looking around for “what to do” precisely because that kind of thing DOES make me feel so inadequate! Last time I checked, I think our little girls mainly just know/want Mommy and Daddy, and fun things to crinkle. 🙂 I am sure Hailey’s will be just perfect, but I’m glad you’re not getting caught up in the perfection frenzy. I LOLed at your description of the 1 year old parties turning into MTV sweet 16s….lol.
Brittany says
Girl, we are one in the same! Though I might try my hand at a few crafts, I certainly don’t have the skill of decorating or party creating. And I think Hailey will be ok with that. Like you said, our girls just want to know they are important and loved 🙂
Thanks so much for commenting. It made me feel better knowing I’m not the only one that feels this way!
danielle says
love your comment…just thinking of my daughter whose favourite toys are my bracelet and car keys…what does she care if i do a minnie mouse theme or a princess sophia party… all she needs is mummy and daddy!
Katie @ Pop Culture Cuisine says
I really try hard not to go overboard, but being an Interior Designer, that inner crafter, perfectionist, organizer comes out in me. I have really tried hard to reign it in a little with Kherie’s upcoming birthday also, because I realize she so won’t care or really even know what is going on, but that other part of me wants it all to go together. I did find a great site http://www.thetomkatstudio.com with tons of cute FREE printables, which I used for her invitations and little tags and stuff. I also have found that Hobby Lobby is a great resource for party decor because you can often find cute little accessories heavily marked down. On a side note though, I’m really trying to get better about how much I “pin” mostly because I do find as women and more importantly mothers we already compare ourselves to each other enough and I agree those sites often just make us feel even more inadequate. I have no doubt Hailey’s party will be just lovely and exactly what you want it to be!
Kristen @ notsodomesticated says
I have learned to just be OK with the fact that I’ll never be as good with decorating as the people I see on those sites haha. I’ve always known that it wasn’t my area of expertise, and seeing the stuff on Pinterest just confirms it even more! 😉
Laura says
Totally agree with all your tips! My kids are 4 and 2 and their birthdays are 3 weeks apart. We’ve done all very simple (& combined) parties either at home or at a local pizza shop that lets you reserve their back room at no cost (just buy your pizza!) & they’ve all been great. And homemade cupcakes FTW! No cutting, no plates, no forks, just pass out and eat!
One thing we did for all the kids parties has been to get their birthday photos done right before and had them out for family and friends to take with them. This works out perfectly, because otherwise I’d have a big stack of photos that would probably never get delivered! Plus, people can choose the poses they like themselves.
Tina @ Best Body Fitness says
Thank you for saying this!!!! My wedding was super simple. My kids’ bday parties are always super simple. Then I keep seeing all these cool ideas and think “Do parents actually DO this????” I’m happy with my cheap and budget friendly party style. Besides, i would rather spend time making memories with my kid around his/her bday than crafting together 30 personalized and handmade goody bags for other peoples’ kids at the party. 😉
Andie says
I am in the midst of party planning for my little guy who will be one in a little over 2 weeks and I have spent a little bit extra, etc. for his party-but we are getting his cakes at Sam’s, doing a very limited menu for the kids and I got all of the printables, etc. from an etsy designer and I have tons of stuff left over for future crafting, etc.
I think I went a little bit overboard, but I figure he only has one first birthday (plus we are celebrating his dad’s birthday too) so why the heck not? 🙂
But for future birthdays, we are doing small family birthdays. We are just going big for his first one! 🙂
Sheila says
I also thank you for posting this!!!! I have came sooooo close to going overboard and doing The Very Hungry Caterpillar theme for my son’s first birthday… completely mocking the book. I spoke with my mother tonight & finally came to my senses and basically told her what YOU posted. For some reason I am set on baking a caterpillar cake so I think I will still do one but ice it in bright primary colors and decorate with the solid colors I use. Thank you again!!!!
Kandice Acierno says
OMG! Thank you for writing this. I literally spend 3 hours yesterday on Pintrest and Etsy finding things for my son’s Dr. Seuss themed 1st birthday. You are completely right, get a few things with the theme and fill in the rest with the colors! I love your idea about emailing the digital copy of the invitation, definitely will save money. You’re a life saver.
Jess says
I am so happy to see I’m not the only one who has anxiety over their child’s first birthday party! I was beginning to think I was crazy. 🙂 Anyway, I love this post and I feel so much better knowing it’s ok to skip those things that don’t matter to the birthday boy, like goodie bags, matching themed decor, etc. I think for the sake of my sanity and our budget, we’ll be keeping his party small, yet memorable. Thank you for sharing your experience!
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