Finding a sitter for the first time is nerve-wracking, especially if it’s for your first baby. As a family we’ve had some wonderful sitters and a select one or two that didn’t end up working out so well. Fact: I once came home in the middle of the day to a sitter sleeping while Hailey and Kaitlyn were toddling around the playroom. Trial and error, my friends, trial and error.
Over the past six years that I’ve been finding, interviewing, and hiring babysitters, I’ve picked up a few pointers along the way that I’m hoping are helpful to pass along. First, my best nuggets of advice:
- A sophomore in high school is a great babysitter age because they most likely will have a reasonable rate, be appreciative of the tax-free money, and you will have 3ish years to be able to use their services.
- A fifth or sixth grader makes for a wonderful mother’s helper. Not only do they usually genuinely enjoy playing with your kids, when they are ready and able to babysit on their own, they already know your house, your kids, and your rules.
- Have more than one sitter. We like to have three we know we can call. It helps if they are in different stages of life so that if something fun is happening at the high school, you aren’t out of luck for snagging a sitter because you can call your go-to college gal.
- Don’t wait until you need on to start searching. It’s stressful.
- If you can find a sitter in the neighborhood, it is ideal. Not only are the close by (no traffic woes), it’s an added layer of comfort that they are in your community and you all know the same people. I also remember calling my mom when I was babysitting if I had a question or concern, and knowing she could come over if I needed her made me feel more at ease.
- Be thorough and direct. More than once I’ve assumed a sitter knew things that they did not. We once came home at 8:15 PM to find the girls (and the sitter) playing in the backyard after I told her bedtime was at 7:00 PM. She said the girls (ages 5 and 2 at the time) told her they weren’t tired. I assumed she would know kids push boundaries, but I was wrong, so I learned to be incredibly detailed with my directions.
- Remember that you are the employer. I’ll be honest, this was (and sometimes still is!) really hard for me. I don’t like feeling bossy, but being clear and direct is not bossy. Hire people you are comfortable with and trust.
- Take the time to interview and have trial days. It’s tedious, but it makes such a positive difference in the long run. Interviewing a few babysitters and selecting your favorites to come over for a 3 hour trial while you are at home is a time investment that will lessen headaches down the road.
Speaking of interviewing, here are the questions I use and have fine tuned over the years. I had a list a mile long when my children were babies and now that the girls are three and six, I sometimes only really care to ask “are you available.” ( I kid, I kid.) However, these eight questions give me the input I’m after to make the decision as to whether or not the sitter is a good fit for our family.
- What interested you in this position?
- What do kids like about you?
- What is your favorite age to watch?
- What are your favorite activities to do with kids?
- How have you handled discipline with kids you’ve cared for?
- Can you tell me about an emergency situation or a scary event that happened while babysitting? How did you handle it?
- What is your availability?
- What questions do you have for us?
These questions are so helpful to me because they will give me insight into what I can expect from them when they are babysitting. Do they say they love crafts, exploring outside, building forts, or do they look at me with a blank stare? Also, I have found go-getter sitters I adore, but they have booming social calendars and are never able to actually commit to babysit. These questions have helped me find some really wonderful, reliable sitters that the kids enjoy and I hope they can help do the same for you!
Share with me:
Do you have any great successes or failures when it comes to babysitters?
What question do you always like to ask potential babysitters?
John J. says
Good directive for a very important job. In my practice I hear too many stories of baby sitter abuse.
Emily says
We have had babysitter boot camp lately, as I’ve had to line a bunch up for sick days. I love all of these suggestions! I keep a “house binder” for babysitters and house sitters with all of our routines, info, wifi passwords, location of the spare key, local contacts, etc. typed up so I don’t have to write it up every time we have a sitter. I also took major advantage of the sittercity/care.com free month trials and got lots of sitter info off there, and have a long contact list when I need someone (since I’m usually texting people at 8 am with “HOW SOON CAN YOU GET HERE SOS”). I also offer my sitter info to my neighbors and friends if I haven’t used them yet (or even if I have) so they can vet them as well, and we all share sitter contacts. I love to vet sitters around dinnertime, since that can be a super stressful time of day for us. They can play in the living room while I cook, and we all get to talk, and it’s a good way to get to know a sitter for an hour without it feeling too onerous for anyone.
Brittany Dixon says
Ohhh what a great tip to test out the sitter at dinnertime! I LOVE that idea.
Stephanie says
This is so helpful! I think sitters are something a lot of home-based parents really struggle with. If you regularly work outside the home you’re forced to deal with the childcare issue. When it seems more “optional” it’s easier to push it aside as a headache you don’t want to deal with until you have to. Where do you typically find your sitters?
Brittany Dixon says
I agree with you! David is the one that pushed for me to find a daytime sitter occasionally and it has really helped. I’ve had the most luck through word of mouth and neighborhood message boards, but I’ve also used Care.com.
Gena says
I love these suggestions! We recently moved to a new area and I have been putting off finding a sitter. This is just the push I need to bight the bullet 😉
Laura says
Great list of questions! Also, another thing about taking your kids to daycare is you almost have built in sitters. We have found all our sitters from our daycare providers. The kids already know them and we trust them, so it is very convenient to hire them to babysit. Still, we only get a babysitter for the home about once every one or two months, depending on what is going on. It is always worthwhile, but makes for an expensive night out once you add in dinner and drinks. Sometimes we have just as much fun playing racquetball or doing a class together at the Y with the free childcare. Other times, for the cost of a nice dinner and bottle of wine, we have snagged a room at a local resort (and bring our own food and wine). That ends up being a super relaxing date night, and it is fun to use the resort facilities (hot tub, pool) without the kids. We pick them up then later after dinner and enjoy the resort as a fun family night out. We live in a very touristy area, so in the off season it is easy to book nice resort rooms for at or under $100.
Brittany Dixon says
What a creative idea to use the cash you would spend on dinner on a hotel room!! That just sounds brilliant to me. Thanks for the idea!
Carine MOGNOL says
Hi Brittany,
I do have a question but slightly different…
If you had you near family closer (your kids’ grand-parents mostly or even aunts/uncles), how would you balance hiring a sitter or leave the kiddos to grandma for a night?
I have both grandmas at a 10-minute drive, my son is 18-month-old. he is going to daycare while we work, so we do see a nice opportunity for him to see the family when are (very occasionally) out for the night.
But I am wondering about the sitter situation…would you still call them so often or less?
Carine
Brittany Dixon says
My family probably doesn’t live nearby because they know I would use them ALL the time 😉
In all seriousness, I would still probably have a sitter or two on call. I feel like I would take family up on their offer when they wanted to watch the girls, but wouldn’t feel as comfortable calling and asking them to watch the kids on my schedule when I needed. Who knows for sure though since I’m not in that situation. It sounds wonderful though!
Jen says
My daughter is almost four and we’ve never hired a sitter. My retired parents live two street so over, though, so you can guess why it hasn’t come up. There’s a fifth grader living in my neighbor who is so, so sweet and good with kids, though, so I’m thinking of seeing if she wants to do some mother’s helper stuff this summer and maybe beyond.
Also: I want to share a funny story of my babysitting way back in the day: the kid was two and they were my Neighbors. Everything was fine until the kid he took a gigantic poop in his diaper… And I couldn’t change it because it made me gag so bad. I called my best friend, who also lived in the neighborhood, and she came over to help me just as the parents got home. Needless to say, they never asked me to babysit again. It makes me crack up thinking about it now!
Brittany Dixon says
Haha, if only you would know how many diapers you’d have to change in the future!! LOL 🙂
Katie says
We’ve had the best luck using daycare staff for sitters! Other than that, we haven’t had to find a sitter- but this post is SO helpful!
I tend to prepare/lay out everything and write out the routine. It helps a lot. I love this notepad, it is so pretty and makes things easy!
https://www.emilyley.com/collections/notepads-notecards/products/babysitter-notepad
Brittany Dixon says
Gosh, Emily Ley has the best stuff doesn’t she?! I hadn’t seen that babysitter pad before. It’s so cute! Thanks for sharing!
Elaine says
This is so timely for me! I was literally on your site yesterday or the day before looking at your posts about babysitters! We have JUST hired our first babysitter. My husband and I both work from home and need someone to come by for a few hours a few days a week while we get some work done. I loved the print out sheet you posted on a different post of rules and contact info. So helpful!
Brittany Dixon says
I’m so glad it was helpful! And yes, I used to think I could do work stuff while the girls are home, but having the split attention never served me well. Having a sitter makes such a difference! 🙂
Lindsay says
We are lucky to have my mother-in-law, a 16 yr old niece and a 13 yr old niece in town, so we don’t have to find non-family babysitters too often. However, when we do, we almost always use one of the teachers at my daughters daycare. Most of them babysit on the side, and even if it is not my daughter’s actual teacher, she has had some kind of positive contact or interaction with almost all of them at some point. So, not only is she comfortable being left alone with them, but I completely trust their abilities.