I got my haircut yesterday and I hate it. I did want a few inches off; I was thinking about H’s length, a couple inches past my shoulders. That would have still been a good 3 inches off because my hair had gotten really long.
My regular hair stylist, whom I adore, is currently at home snuggling her new baby, so I went to someone new. Looking back now, I blame myself. I should have been more bold. I should have said please opt on the conservative side of the cut, knowing more can be taken off. I should have done anything besides getting wide eyed as she dried my hair then sitting in my car crying my eyes out afterwards.
For someone that doesn’t cry all that often, it feels extremely dramatic and silly to be shedding tears over a haircut. Logically I know it’s just 6″ of hair. It will grow back. And it’s going to take a lot less time to style now. Emotionally, I hate it. I hate the way it looks; I hate the way it feels; I hate the way it makes me feel.
But this experience has gifted me with a dose of perspective. How many times has something been upsetting to one of my kids that I, with adult logic and perspective, felt wasn’t that big of deal? In toddlerhood maybe it’s that we couldn’t find her favorite cup. In childhood maybe the rain washed away the chalk creation she drew. Little things to the world; big things in her world. Have I always met those time with the empathy I should have? Probably not.
Perhaps I was due for a skills refresh and this experience will help guide better guide my parenting responses. Maybe now I’ll be even better at responding the way David, my mom, and friends responded to me. Not with a “it’s hair; you’re being silly,” but with a “ugh, that stinks; I’m so sorry. You look beautiful.” A little compassion and comfort was just what I needed to put on my big girl pants, take a deep breath, find my hair straightener, and google search for Biotin.
Thanks for letting me share a silly story about my hair. Now does anyone know any tricks that truly help hair grow faster? 🤞🏽
Amber says
Oh I could have written these exact words a few months ago. I remember commenting on one of your posts where you talked about potentially cutting your hair. I have the same hair length and thickness as you and I chopped mine. The style looks almost exactly like your picture on this post! We are twins in looks and feelings! 🙂
I don’t have any tips or tricks and I understand your feelings totally. I think the analogy you shared is so true. My 16 month old just weaned from nursing unexpectedly and the sudden loss in connection was really tough for me. I had similar thoughts as the analogy you shared- how many times have I pulled a connection that didn’t seem like a big deal to me but really affected my children or loved ones?
Anyways, I do think because you have since beautiful, healthy hair the cut is really pretty on you ❤️ Here’s to hoping we both have some extra fast hair growth this summer!!
Brittany Dixon says
Oh big hug for you and the weaning- I was SUPER emotional about that with my babies, too. It’s totally understandable. Thank you for your loving words, my hair twin! <3 🙂
Val says
Collagen peptides! Miracle worker as I grew out my hair for my wedding, even my hairdresser was impressed with how quickly it worked. Haircuts have such an impact on mood, sending you good vibes!!
Brittany Dixon says
Oh good reminder to pull those out of the pantry! I also heard rosemary oil on the scalp. I’ll do both! 🙂
Kate says
This happened to me too but it was a slow build to admitting I didn’t like it. Then I was mad at myself for not articulating what I really wanted and brushing it off and not acknowledging my actual feelings -like what other people do to us all the time. And you know why I think it bothered me? Its a 40yo mom cut. And you’ll never guess how old I am!
Brittany Dixon says
Lol! That made me giggle; I’ll be 40 later this year so I get it 🙂 <3
Holly Watson says
Everything you just said. Hair “issues” always make me feel horrible instantly and I always feel guilty that I feel upset! And what a GREAT spin to take it in stride and as a reminder to how we care for our children.
But I’ve been waiting for this awful haircut to show it’s face and I think it looks great! I’m not just saying this to make you feel better (I don’t even know you haha) but it truly looks great on you. Fresh, young, trendy. It’s like spring, a new look for a short period of time 🙂 Regardless of my thoughts, I know all too well how your hair can make or break how you feel about yourself. Lots of love to you, you look beautiful <3
Brittany Dixon says
Thanks so much, Holly! I did feel a little silly sharing a picture because I felt I’d get a side eye (well deserved) because it’s not that short by normal standards, but gosh I’m missing those 6″… I feel naked! Thanks for the kind words! 🙂
Heather says
Maybe not what you want to hear….but it really does look amazing! I have been there though so I completely understand!
April Zook says
I know the feeling of having a bad haircut…our hair is a lot of what makes us feel beautiful so when we get a cut we didn’t expect it’s devastating. On that note, I have to say I absolutely love your hair short! It looks great on you and you have such pretty hair anyways that any cut would look great on you!
Brittany Dixon says
Thank you, April! We’ll see how it looks once I’m stuck styling it myself instead of the salon- lol! But thank you <3
Kelli H says
Sorry Brittany! It is such a sucky feeling to have. I think most of us have felt that way! Good reminder for me too because Camryn never wants to get any amount cut off and I’m always trying to push her to cut it despite how beautiful it is. For what it’s worth it’ll look nice a refreshing during the warmer weather but I know it’s hard now! 🙁
Brittany Dixon says
Dealing with the opposite here- K wants to cut bangs and I’m dragging my feet because they sound like an upkeep nightmare, ha!
Karen A. says
I know the feeling of getting a haircut that was not the one you wanted. That said, for what it’s worth, I think this cut is lovely and very flattering on you. We don’t always see ourselves the way others do! And it looks like it will grow out very nicely. I’m still growing my hair out from a pandemic pixie cut–my hair had just gotten annoying and I chopped it–and I just now am at the chin-length bob length but I wish it were YOUR length! 🙂
Brittany Dixon says
Thank you! For your kind words, but also for your grace of understanding that we don’t always see ourselves the way others do. I’m sure I’ll get used to it and enjoy the quicker dry time while it grows. Also, a few people have told me rosemary oil on the scalp can help hair grow faster. Who knows but from one lady wanting her hair to grow to another, maybe it’s useful! 🙂
Joanna says
Curly girl over here and I’ve sure gotten bad haircuts in the past, so I understand how you feel. You do look good though! Just think very hot Charlotte temps are around the corner so maybe shorter will feel lighter/less hot?! If you can still put it in a ponytail then it’s all good!
Sammie says
I still shudder thinking about a bad haircut I got a few years ago! Yours looks cute, though I totally get how jarring it is and how you feel not like yourself! I took biotin and prenatal vitamins after mine!
Trina says
How you feel about your haircut is correct. It’s your hair! But, honestly, your shorter cut looks fresh and updated. I love the length!
Jaelyn Hamilton says
I so get this!!! My hair is curly and any time I need to get it trimmed or cut it’s a little discouraging because it get so short and then I start comparing it to everyone around me!!
This was such a good reminder for me to have compassion for what others feel is a major deal! I’m often the same and get confused as to why people are upset about things that don’t seem like a big deal to me, but I would want someone to listen to me and have compassion for me so I gotta treat others the same!!!